Amber has been having some bad days at school. Of course, she doesn't fill me in until the mornings right before school. This doesn't give us a lot of time to talk and problem solve together, but it should give me a lot of time to think about an appropriate response. Unfortunately, I don't always have the right answers even after I think about it. YIKES, that scares me!
Last week apparently a little boy in her class walked up to her and said "I don't like you. You are not my friend. " right in her face. I, of course, went into immediate defense mode when she told me this in the morning as she was sobbing that she didn't want to go to school. What is a parent to do? How dare this little boy hurt my beautiful little girls feelings? I finally talked her into going to school after promising that Amy and I would come eat lunch with her. After eating lunch, when the kids were outside this little boy walked up to me and asked my to tie his shoe. While I was tying his shoe I asked him if he said those things to Amber, of course he said "No", DUH what did I expect him to say...he is 5 maybe 6, if he said them, he probably wouldn't remember anyway...I quickly explained that she thought that he didn't like her and that it hurt her feelings. WHAT WAS I DOING?
See, I told you should have been thinking about an appropriate answer...this was not it. This was my maternal instinct kicking in. She needs to learn a way to handle these sorts of things on her own. Her mommy will not always be able to come to her rescue. Oh how I wish I could, but then she really would have any friends...HA!
After talking to my very smart friend, Andrea, who has more experience in this since her kiddos are a little older, we decided that we needed to arm her with a response when people say things that she perceives as hurtful.
Her response is "WHATEVER" and walk away.
Have any of you encountered this, and if so what is your mommy response?
9 months ago
A very hard lesson. I would be the same way if I heard of someone being mean to Kanin but they do have to learn to stand up for themselves and to not let others get to them.
ReplyDeletethat makes me so sad hearing it. I would have called the boy a bad name and had the school mad at me. lol It's hard to take a step back and let your children fight thier own battles. It's our mommy duty to protect our babies. Good luck Milli!
ReplyDeletethis is helpful b/c i wouldn't know what to do either. rebecca would probably tell the person off...at least i hope she would! kids can be so mean but when they're that young they are just trying things out, unfortunately. it's so hard having to let the kids grow up!! i hate it!
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